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Impacts of Broken or Dysfunctional Marriage/Relationships

The Devastating Effects of Divorce and Separation on the Couple/Spouses
© Dr Joel Akande. MBBS (MD) Dip Repro Biol., MBA, LLB (JD)

Chapter Nine
Causes of Broken Marriages, Broken Relationships and Their Consequences on the Couple
“Marriage is one long conversation, checkered with disputes.”
Robert Louis Stevenson

Now we have covered the formation of relationships and what sustains them. We have also seen what love is---a central issue in relationships. I have also discussed what could tear relationships apart. We have equally seen in great detail, the advantages and disadvantages of marriage and other forms of intimate relationships, as well as single living. Let us now take a good look at when these relationships are wrecked or at the minimum, when they undergo stress and strain. Human beings, it may interest you, can change like the weather. Human beings behave like a metal when exposed to intense pressure; tending to show considerable stress.

See Here For:  The Effect of Broken Relationship on the Children

In this chapter, I will be concerned with the consequences of broken relationships. As a result of the considerable impact that separation and broken relationships entail on the individuals and the children, I will look at this in the next few chapters. This is so because a lot of individuals and couples who are entering into relationships seem not to be aware of the potential adverse outcomes of what they are about to go into. Also, broken relationships can and do have dire consequences for the individual, the couple, the family and the society at large. Most importantly, strained relationships have serious consequences for the apparently innocent children that may be caught in between the couples.

See Here: What You Ought  To Know in Relationships

As a basic rule, whenever you have more than one person together there is bound to be a conflict. To avoid complex psychological argument that you could have a conflict even within an individual (such as body-mind split or lack of coordination between the brain and the body of a person), I will stick with my basic rule. Therefore, the minimum is two people together. They could be focusing on the same task or different tasks. For example: two children who are playing together could end up having a disagreement even though they will make up soon.

See How to Deal With Rejection, Despair, Broken Hearts and Failure

A manager and his employee could disagree and have conflicts. Whenever there is a relationship, there is bound to be conflicts. It could be about a thing that conflicts with an individual’s interests, or it could be disagreement about how to achieve a target. In human relationships this simple principle holds even between the tongue and the teeth so close, yet the teeth can occasionally bite into the tongue as they say, when there is a disagreement, or if you like in medical terms, “dis-co-ordination” between the tongue and the teeth!

See Here: What You Ought  To Know in Relationships

In marriage and in any relationship whatever its form or shape, there is a supposedly high level of trust between the couple, dependency on each other for security and financial support by the couple as well as the children in the relationship---all depending on one another for their overall well being---in an atmosphere of trust. In addition, there is a high level of expectation for the future by the children and the couples as well. They all want to live trouble-free, stress-free lives. No reasonable person likes trouble in any event. Hanging on this expectation, as we have seen, are happiness, mental stability of the couple or the individuals as well as the mental, physical and future stability of any children who may be involved. 

See How to Deal With Rejection, Despair, Broken Hearts and Failure

Similarly, the happiness of in-laws, who are secure in the knowledge that their children are in “love” and in stable relationships, may take a knock. Family members and friends may also be directly or indirectly affected by the break down of the marriage or relationship.
The larger society also depends on marriage for nurturing the next generation of individuals and to give effect to the mental as well as physical and social stability or cohesion to everyone that are involved in the marriage.

  See Here For:  The Effect of Broken Relationship on the Children

From these innocent dependencies, it is clear and predictable what the likely effects of marriage and relationship break ups would be. It is relatively easy to predict the likely impact of a broken relationship and broken homes.  Thinking globally and biologically, regardless of any religious inclination, it appears that any home, family and couples, who keep, strictly, to their biologically assigned roles are less likely to have conflicts. That is man function as man and woman functions as woman. Why would a true male of XY gene want to usurp the female function to be pregnant?

See How to Deal With Rejection, Despair, Broken Hearts and Failure

Why would a male father fail to instruct, defend and secure his children and home when he is healthy, employed and able to do so? I am not unaware of the roles that the law or various legal systems have played in blurring the gender roles or supposed ill-feeling by men that the law has been used in emasculation of male capabilities, however, the more these biological roles are blurred, the more the likelihood of conflicts. This is perhaps the reason that in homes across the world and cultures where their roles are kept intact, there is less chance of conflicts.

  Discover how to deal or handle relationship abuse

That is to say, peace will endure in situations when men keep their biological roles where women feel safe, healthy and secure without oppression from the men. It should nevertheless be remembered that men are ultimately, in most homes, responsible for domestic provisions and security. That said, conflict will be less likely when women give support to the men without contempt, betrayal and embarrassments against the man This is especially so when things occasionally fail to measure up to expectations. In saying this, let me go into further real life details to explain what specific issues lead to conflict in human intimate relationships, for that is the crux of the matter, as the saying goes.
Origin of conflict in a relationship...Continue this here...

Effects of Divorce / Separation (see also the advantages and disadvantages of marriage). 

Financial Implications:  Short term
On the woman:  Though the role of who is the  “the breadwinner”   Continue this here...
For the man: Given the traditional role of the man as the one who the family, including Continue this here...***. 
Impact on property and assets
Long term
  Continue this here...

Health Impacts (Physical and mental)

  Continue this here...

Effects on Future Relationships.
  Continue this here...

Table of Contents
Introduction: Every Human Dilemma                                          
Section I
Intimate Relationships
Chapter One:                                                                          
Names Do Matter                                                                               
Chapter Two: 
The Root of Relationships and the Crucible of   

Chapter Three:
The Purpose of Marriage                                                                 
Chapter Four: 
The Choice of Spouse and Partner:
Free Will and the Choices that We Make                                      
Chapter Five: 
Why Marriages and Relationships Fail or                         

Chapter Six:    
Adolescent Relationship: The Turbulent Years                             
Chapter Seven:
Is this Love or Deceit? Why Does “Love” 
Hurt so Badly?                                                                                       
Chapter Eight: 
Advantages and Disadvantages of Marriage                         
And Partnership/Co-habitation Relationships,
With Legal, Medical, Social, Implications                                        
Chapter Nine:  
Consequences of Broken Marriages and
Broken Relationships                                                                          
Chapter Ten:    
Broken Marriages: Effects on Children                                           
Chapter Eleven:
Broken Marriages/Partnerships: Effects on
Relatives, Friends and In-laws                                                           
Chapter Twelve:
Broken Marriages: Effects on Society         
Chapter Thirteen:
Anger and Frustration: Causes,                       
And Management in Relationships                                                    
Chapter Fourteen:
There is Power in Knowing: Talking Frankly with You                  
Chapter Fifteen: 
Relationship Questionnaire/Assessment Scales                         
      Chapter Sixteen:
      Conflict Resolutions in Relationships                                                
Chapter Seventeen:
Sex in Relationships: Snare or Serenity?
Is Sex Necessary?                                                                               

Chapter Eighteen:
Gender Differences: What You Should Know                                 
Chapter Nineteen:
Sample of Marriage/Partnership Agreement                                  
Section II
Platonic Relationships
(Non-Sexual Relationships)
Chapter Twenty:                                                                    
Chapter Twenty One:
Children, Siblings and Extended Family Relationships                        
Chapter Twenty Two:
Business Relationships                                                                                
Section III
Chapter Twenty Three:
Maintenance of Relationships                                                                   
Chapter Twenty Four:
Instances of One-Sided Relationships:
Abuse of Relationships                                                                                
Chapter Twenty Five: 
Stories of Successful and Dreadfully Failed Relationships                 
Twenty Six:                
References                                                                                                         330


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